The title this article has been a long standing, relative to my age of 57 in this year of someone’s Lord 2023, twas provided to some women and men on the day of their matrimonial union. Both Karl Marx and Winston Churchill amongst others, have commented that history repeats, though I’m more inclined to support the idea that history rhymes. This leaves for me the question of how did the saying that forms the title of this writing get started in the first place?
The title of this writing started off as “Something old, something new, something borrowed, and something blue.” I feel that this rhyme needs to be looked at in a bit of detail because there is a lack of marriage which is something relatively new; relative to my age of 57 in this year of someone’s Lord 2023. Consider the concepts of both ‘tradition’ and ‘stereo typing’, and how there must be some underpinning truth propping up both of these practices.
Returning to the title, the only item that seems up for debate is the Blue item. I try to be open minded until it comes to food, though I’m still open to some leeway outside of my likes and dislikes when it comes to Italian food and Brussels sprouts respectfully. The current narrative is that blue represents fidelity and faithfulness; and while pink use to be the colour associated with boys, for some historical reason, that colour shifted to blue. So yes, the blue thing is outside of my understanding.
The remaining three seem to me to be pretty simple and while I am going explain them as I see them. My explanations will come with cognitive bias, though as these explanations are based on my lived experience no one is allowed to complain about; or so I’ve been told by some of the people participating in public discourse.
Something ‘Old’ was put there to remind the couple of where they came from; yes it is just that simple. Returning to Marx and Churchill and their commentary about history repeating, this saying can work in the direction of good, the not-good or the bad. Look to your elders is my suggestion as they survived a life neither as safe nor rich as yours.
Something ‘New’ for me asserts the position that what is beyond the horizon is not explored and yet needs to always be kept front of mind as it is unyielding. The 4.8 km, or just less than three miles to the horizon is not that far away, it is about forty minutes of casual walking. While, the ‘New’ will always be there, so will be ‘Old’. There is a sense of thread here, with how time works.
Something ‘Borrowed’ for me is a statement that provides a connection to community via friendship. Friendships can be based upon utility, convenience, pleasure, or virtue; the first item in this list I will dismiss because ‘utility’ does not make friendship. I assert that most good friendships need two out of the three friendship ingredients to remain stabile. These things do wax and wane over time, though it is usually those grounded in similar virtues that last the longest; co-workers rarely stay friends beyond re-employment.
If one is going to embrace this saying, how I see what was intended, then each of these tactile items must be as unique as the source individuals. My call for four individuals, I hope follows the intent of the original rhyme and of the wedding ceremony, the literal support of the couple’s families, their friends, their community, and faith.
The wedding ceremony is an important demonstration by all parties involved, though the ‘community’ portion of the previous paragraph is obviously subjective. While community can be defined as people living in the same place, I prefer the other meaning where people have a feeling of fellowship as a result of common attitudes, interests and goals. And seeing as I live in a big city, and I feel many other urbanites feel similarly, while I live in a neighbourhood, I have had to create my own community if I want to live in one.
So far there has been about a page and a half on a single tradition, though this was not the thrust of this article. Traditions come about because the message within that convention was good for the people in the source community. I do wonder how many wannabe traditions never came to fruition simply because the messaging was off; conversely one can not deny that the traditions of old had longevity and duration, at least until a shift in the underlying conditions. Why did the tales provided by the Brothers Grimm last so long, or the Boy Who Cried Wolf tale historically survive; simply put, because the messaging in these stories had a meaning that could be taken away as a life lesson.
The underlying conditions have changed and I’m left to wonder what the next round of traditional stories will be, or will the old ones linger on longer still. Many of the ‘classics’ from my childhood reinforced socially beneficial messages learned from history. As an example there is Charlie and Chocolate Factory written by Ronald Dahl and published in 1964; while only Five Golden Tickets were issued by Willy Wonka all of the children who exhibited an overly dramatic character flaw were exited from the tour showing that the youngsters who adopted these flaws lead to no good. For those not in the know or who have never considered it, the flaws of the four exited children match up quite nicely with just over half of the seven deadly sins.
And to those who refute the ideal of something old, something
new, and something borrowed; put down your phone and walk in nature and then feel
the bark of a few different trees so you can understand that a good life requires
variety; oh and around the same time please pet an animal.
